Monday, March 14, 2011

Feeling Fat Again

I'm almost two months out now.  As I mentioned before, my stall has broken, but now the scale is moving at a snail's pace.  I guess I need to stop weighing every day, but I can't help it!  I don't think the hydration sensor on my new scale is very accurate.  I went several days getting adequate fluids, and it still reads between 33-35%.  

I have lost a total of 56 pounds now.  That's 28 pre-op and 28 post-op.  The other day, something happened that made me feel like I never lost those 56 pounds, but in fact gained 56 pounds.  My husband and I took our kids out to dinner.  When we were done eating, went out to get in the van.  Although we looked before crossing the parking lot, out of nowhere a Ford Explorer sped through the parking lot and almost hit two of our three children.  I got the kids safely in the car and my husband confronted the driver, an early twenty something woman.  She got very hateful with him and said loud enough for our children to hear, "If I had seen them, I would have run them the f___ over."  I was just shocked that somebody could say that!  It really scared my kids (not to mention us!)  We ended up getting the police involved and she has been in trouble for quite a bit before.  Anyway, when she made the comment about running them over, my jaw hit the floor and I commented on how that was uncalled for.  She told me, "Shut up, you fat b***h!"  I was already incredibly upset that our children were almost hit, so that hit me like a ton of bricks.  We were shaken up for the rest of the night, we'd had plans to go shopping but decided to go home.  I don't want it to seem like I wasn't concerned for the kids, or that what follows is more important, but this blog is about weight loss, not my children, so I'm blogging about how her comment made me feel.  For the last few days, I've stewed over that.  All this work that I've put into losing weight and she took all of my success away in those five little words.  I feel horrible, sad, defeated.  I know that I shouldn't let her have that power over me, but I can't help it.  It gets to me. 

So, anyway... I haven't lost much in the past month.  I'm worried that when I go back to see my surgeon next month that he won't be happy with my progress.  I've been working out a lot, getting my protein and fluids in and my calories range from 600-800 a day.  I really limit my carbs and rarely have anything with sugar.  I bought these little Mio bottles.  They are amazing, they taste great!  I just add a couple squirts to a bottle of water.  It's great flavor, no calories, no sugar, no carbs.  Just flavor, plain and simple.  They have fruit punch, strawberry watermelon, sweet tea, peach tea, berry pomegranate and mango peach.  This is my order of preference.  My kids love it, too.  So much, in fact, that I'm already going to have to buy some more of the Fruit Punch and I've had it less than a week.  But, I'd rather they drink this than a sugary drink.


  1. Hmm, I will have to check into these Mio things, I am dead tired of diet Snapple tea. :)

    I'm very sorry about the crazy woman with the van. You know as well as I do that you have to tune in *hard* to your inner voice that is focused on your achievements. Screw the external voices that lash out in anger or judgment or whatever. You know the road you're on, you know you are on course and doing fine.

    But it still sucks. I have been working on a blog post about crappy things that we said to me that scarred me. It's hard to shake them off, but you know you have to!!

  2. Where fo you get those juice bottles its sounds like something I need?

  3. Gina, I found them at Murphysboro Walmart by the Crystal Light. I wasn't able to find them at Carbondale, though.

    Julie, thank you! It's hard to dismiss it, but I'm trying.

  4. Well that sucks. That lady clearly has some issues (I mean who almost runs over kids in a PARKING LOT and then yells at someone who calls her out on being a crazy driver?) She should have tucked her tail between her legs and apologized profusely. Sorry she made that comment to you. Shake it off and chalk her up to insane.

  5. Julie's advice is dead on! So sorry you had a run in with an a-hole like that! You have been doing great with your progress. I just had a similar experience with someone (though it was through online...cuz I think he would be afraid to say anything to my face lol). SO I feel your frustration. Don't let it get you down because you are awesome and have been making great strides!

    I saw that Mio thing at walmart the other night. I may have to pick one up and give it a try. I am a big fan of peach and mango peach tea.