Psychological Evaluation

My psychological evaluation was scheduled for December 28th at 2pm.  Although I arrived 15 minutes early to my appointment, I had a sinking feeling that something was wrong.  I got to the window to check in, but they didn't have me on their schedule.  They penciled me in, instead, for December 29th.  By the time I had gotten back to my car, I was  fighting tears back.  I had mentally prepared myself for this and was so disappointed that it didn't happen.  I calmed myself down and reminded myself that it's just one more day. 

The thing is that my appointments keep getting cancelled and rescheduled, and I feel like it's never going to happen, that it's just too good to be true.  Really, after being fat all my life and working toward this surgery for the past 4 1/2 years, could it really happen?  Or, am I just fooling myself, setting myself up for another disappointment.  Is it really too good to be true?  I have a hard time believing that I'll ever be at a normal body weight. 

I went back for my appointment yesterday, cpap in hand.  I was told to bring it because I was seeing the sleep medicine doctor, who also has a background in psychiatry.  I was nervous about taking the cpap because I've been having so many issues with it.  The last few nights have been much better, and I've been able to sleep most of the night with it on - though, I think it's partly because I took some Tylenol PM before bed.  He read the little SD card in the machine and could tell that I've been gradually doing better with it.  My sleep time seems to increase each night.  Overall, he seemed happy with the progress.  He set me up for another appointment in April.  At that time, I'll get to bring home a device that will has a nasal cannula and a pulse-ox to see if my hypopnea has went down.  No more sleep studies for now, thank God!!  He expects me to be able to come off of it eventually.  That was like music to my ears. 

After we discussed the sleep issues, we went on to psychological issues.  He took a basic history - medications, family history, previous psych issues.  The only major issue that came up is that he confirmed about seven years ago, I had a major depressive episode.  It was right after I lost my daughter and I really struggled with daily life.  However, he said that it was understandable given the circumstance and I am fully recovered.  I do have a lot of stress in my life, though.  I have three kids ages 6, 6 and 5.  I am also going back to school to finish my Social Work degree and my husband has been recovering from a traumatic accident last January that left him permanently disabled.  I have decreased my school work load for the spring semester, only taking two classes which are mostly online, because I knew I wouldn't be able to handle the full course load.  He has recommended that I see a therapist once or twice after surgery to discuss any issues that I may have. 

One thing that stood out was him calling me a goody two shoes!  He said he could tell by looking at me that I didn't smoke, drink or do drugs.  He complimented me on the list I made a couple years ago of improvements I wanted to make in my life.  He thought it was a great idea and could see that I've strived to make that list a reality.  He also thought that I was the perfect candidate for this surgery because I am young, have no major health issues, I fully understand the procedure, am aware of the risks and complications and I have the determination to follow through. 

So, that's it!  I have been cleared for bariatric surgery.  And, he didn't commit me.  That's a huge plus.